29 April 1997
RI-850i 'Re my father - Part IV - his marriage problem'
from Ambassador for Mankind
Message # RI-850i for Internet
"He refuses to have any responsibility whatsoever
for Ma's sanity.
And so his 'solution' is
to allow her to be as evil as she compulsively is.
"People don't like to be evil,
no matter how much they might 'enjoy' it.
In actual fact,
we are looking here at an intention of my father
to destroy the sanity of my mother - upon her demand.
"They call that
'living together' and
'compromising in order to let each other live happily'."
'Ambassador for Mankind'
Telepathic Auditing-session with Pa (Koos' father),
on 29 April 1997, 11:56 GMT
ordered by Ambassador for Mankind.
(An Auditor is someone who listens.)
reference:
RI-771i 'Use of Telepathy' of 4 Jan 1997
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/ri-771i.htm
THE LIES COME OUT
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night? LFBD's
[Pa:]
"What I told you, that is, told Koos, is not true:
It was NOT that I went to an Art exhibition." LFBD's
[Auditor:] Pa refuses to tell me [refuses to answer my question].
(I am repeating the question
with intention to get at the bottom of it.)
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night? LFBD
[Pa:]
"I was at home.
"I had told Ma, some time ago already,
to tell Koos, when he phones, that I am not there. LFBD
"When Koos phoned [yesterday-evening],
I was in my room and did some drawing [art], LFBD
Ma took up the phone and answered fast something
in order to make Koos give up wanting to communication to me. LFBD
"She hoped Koos wouldn't phone again
when she tells him I would be back late at night. LF's
"She didn't want to say anything
about when I would be back,
but as Koos asked, she pretended a late time.
"Then she
put down the phone and
told me about Koos' phone call and what she had told Koos. F's
"I wanted to cover up LFBD
my own intention from earlier
[to please Ma and give in to her demand]
not to talk to Koos.
"I wanted to cover up that Ma lied FOR me -
so [when Koos phoned again later in the evening,
after being told by Ma that I am out]
I had invented something,
where I might have been,
in case Koos phones again. LFBD
[Note by Koos:
How complicated can you get.
IN ORDER to please her, he asks her to do something evil.
Thereby he "shows her" that he is "on her side".]
[Pa:]
"I didn't want that Koos phones again,
but I knew he would phone again. LFBD
"I wanted to make a good impression on Koos, F
and
I wanted to cover up F
that Ma had lied for me.
"So I picked up the phone when Koos phoned again, and
I pretended to have just come home. F's
"I wanted [further] to make a good impression on Koos,
so [when Koos proposed to meet without Ma being present]
I pretended that it is all right with me
to meet Koos without Ma,
but in fact I do not know
how to justify that towards her. LFBD
"I want to make a good impression on Koos
by pretending to want to meet him (and I indeed want to meet him)
but
I don't want to spend a few hundred German Marks, Dutch Guilders, for it.
"Koos' suggesting
that I would take an airplane to come to him and
spend maybe 500 to 800 Dutch Guilders on it,
made me very upset,
made me want to destroy Koos intention to see me at his home.
[Note by Koos:
The sole value of a justification is: "Is it acceptable?"
Logic is not a necessary ingredient.
'Having to spend money' is always
an acceptable reason for him not to do something.]
[Pa:]
"[But] I want to make a good impression on Koos. LFBD
"We can meet somewhere in Holland LF
to exchange good news,
so that Koos knows that it is not me
who is the one who is kicking him out, LF
but I AM AFRAID TO TALK [with Koos] ABOUT ANYTHING REGARDING MA. LFBD
"Maybe, when I meet Koos without Ma,
I can [by that] show Koos
that I am independent from Ma. LFBD
But I don't want to spend much money on it,
and Ma also would not want me to do that. LFBD
[Note by Koos:
He wants to show me that he is independent from Ma,
while he is in fact
nothing but a puppet on a string (a marionette) to her.]
[Pa:]
"Ma would consider it 'treason', 'betraying her'. LFBD
"She also does not want that I spend some days with Koos.
She fears Koos might 'influence me against her'. LFBD
"And I am afraid
of that and
of her becoming upset.
That is, [I am afraid of her becoming upset]
because I am living with her."
[Note by Koos:
He refuses to have any responsibility whatsoever
for Ma's sanity.
And so his "solution" is
to allow her to be as evil as she compulsively is.
People don't like to be evil,
no matter how much they might "enjoy" it.
In actual fact,
we are looking here at an intention of my father
to destroy the sanity of my mother - upon her demand.
They call that
"living together" and
"compromising in order to let each other live happily".]
HOW TO LIVE WITH A SUPPRESSIVE WIFE
[Auditor:] What is the truth
about what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"I did this in order
not to have to confront [face the insanity of] Ma. LFBD
[Note by Auditor:] And he justifies it immediately:
[Pa:]
"And why should I? LF
The children are since long out of the house.
I live with Ma, and, in part, I have my own sphere. LFBD
Why change that?"
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"I do not know how to live with Ma
if I would confront [face the insanity of] Ma,
as Koos has described her.
"So that I CAN live with Ma,
I have to reject Koos' view of her LFBD LFBD
and
I HAVE TO REFUSE TO LOOK at
how she manipulated me to kick Koos out. LFBD LFBD
(see RI-841i 'My mother - regrettably, but true: a suppressive person')
"I do not know how to
live with Ma LFBD
and
talk with Ma,
if I would listen to [the truth from] Koos." LFBD LFBD LF's
[Note by Koos:
The great coward says
"The only way to 'live' with a Suppressive Person is
to pretend that he or she is NOT a Suppressive Person, and
to refuse flatly to look."
(see the RI-Bulletins
on Maria-Louise "living with" Napoleon Bonaparte.)]
GRIEF ABOUT HIS BETRAYAL OF KOOS
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Note by Auditor:] I perceive Pa's emotional grief-charge. LFBD
[Pa:]
"Truth is that I had a good time with Koos. LFBD
(grief-charge continues) LF's
"When Koos was a boy that was -
BEFORE Ma told me
'to exert my authority' and
'to cite the law [on parent-child relations]' to Koos." LF's
[Auditor:] I Assess your A-R-C-Break with Koos, that is caused by Ma
[your Break in Affinity for Koos,
your Break in Reality about Koos,
your Break in Communication with Koos,
your Break in Understanding Koos].
in Affinity LF IND (indicated to Pa)
in Reality LF LFBDBD IND
(further grief-charge of Pa is turning on) LFBDBD
[Pa:]
"My reality of Koos changed
[when I gave in to Ma's command to destroy Koos]: LFBD LFBD
From 'Koos being a friend, a teammate,
with whom I enjoyed being together.'
[Note by Koos:
This should and must be the normal, sane relation
between a parent and child
- it is also the relation I have with my children.
Such a relationship is also providing the best climate
for education and for discussing and handling
the problems of life.]
To 'Koos being a "burden of responsibility".' LFBD
"This must have been Ma's idea about Koos." F's
[Note by Koos:
This is Ma's idea about ANYBODY.
When she is with another
she feels that the presence of the other
even gives her the burden of
having to take 'responsibility' for herself:
For herself talking coherently and
for herself keeping up a pretense of a
"well-educated", "responsible" citizen, wife and mother.]
[Auditor:] I further Assess your A-R-C-Break with Koos,
that is caused by Ma:
in Communication LF IND
in Understanding F IND
[Auditor:] I now Assess your Break in Reality further.
How did the Break occur?
desired Reality sF
"My desire to have a common reality with Koos,
went to pieces [was destroyed].
enforced Reality LF
"Ma enforced HER Reality of Koos on me.
"I HAD agreement with Koos,
and Ma forced me [instead] to agree with HER." LFBD
[Auditor:] I Assess your Break in Communication further. LFBD
refused Communication sF IND
"I refused Communication to Koos
AFTER Ma refused her Communication to Koos:
She herself didn't want to communicate to Koos, and
she asked me to do it [what SHE wanted to do to Koos] FOR her."
(see RI-811i 'Telepathic talk with my brother' of 27 Mar 1997)
[Note by Koos:
She does not want to talk to Koos,
she REFUSES to talk to Koos,
because Koos already then, when Koos was 14 years old,
looked through
her pretenses, and already then saw
her very evil compulsions and attempts
to cave Pa and their children in.]
[Auditor:] I Assess the Break in Affinity further:
no Affinity sF IND
[Auditor:] I further Assess your Break, caused by Ma,
in your Understanding of Koos:
curious about Understanding F IND IND
[Auditor:] Your curiosity to Understand Koos was broken -
and that was caused by Ma. LFBD
BETRAYING HIS AFFINITY FOR KOOS
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night? LFBD
[Pa:]
"I was, once AGAIN, betraying my Affinity
which I had for Koos when Koos was a boy,
[and again] in order to appease Ma."
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"I WAS HIDING MY AFFINITY FOR KOOS LFBD
IN ORDER TO HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH MA.
"I could have phoned Koos back immediately, and
[I could have] told him
that Ma, on my order, was telling Koos lies.
"But then she would have been upset with ME,
because I had asked her to lie."
[Note by Koos:
I think you get the idea -
he does anything, no matter
how dishonorable, indecent,
or destructive of his own goals,
in order not to have to face
his wife's upsets,
his wife's insane anger and
his wife's refusal to talk to him.
In order to have the "pleasure"
of her being "friendly" to him,
he does anything whatsoever that she wants,
no matter how insane.
Quite apart from that,
he refuses to in any way stop his wife's insanity,
which - as you know by now -
is NOT doing her a favor at all.]
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"I refused to look at my problems with Ma,
I STILL refuse that.
I rather pretend 'to have "no problems" with her'."
(see RI-24i 'Definition of 'PTS' - IMPORTANT' of 19 Nov 1994)
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night? LFBD
[Pa:]
"I do not want to be asked by Koos
to help him with money
[because Ma does not like that,
because Ma wants to destroy Koos (Note by Koos)]. LFBD
"I thought: 'When Koos phones me, he wants money from me'. LF
And Ma said that, too
[that she thought Koos would phone for that reason]." LFBD
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night? LFBD
[Pa:]
"I am hiding myself,
because I don't want to be asked by Koos for money." LFBD
[Note by Koos:
He means, that he does not want
to be asked to CONTRIBUTE to Koos.
He means, that if he would contribute to Koos
AS A REAL HELP - not in order to get rid of him -
he would have to face his own insanity.]
THE PRETENSE OF THE MARIONETTE - PUPPET ON A STRING
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"I DO WHAT MA WANTS ME TO DO, LFBD
BECAUSE I HAVE TO LIVE WITH MA,
AND MA WANTS ME NOT TO COMMUNICATE WITH KOOS. LF
[Note by Koos:
Interesting way of "living together" with someone!]
(see also RI-543i 'Dictators' of 22 July 1994, issued 2 May 1996
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/ri-543i.htm)
[Pa:]
"So I told her:
'When Koos phones, tell him I am not there'. LFBD
"You can 'get along with Ma' if you do what she wants. LFBD
[Note by Koos:
This is the "standard" way
of "getting along with a suppressive person"
- AND
of ruining yourself
AND others
AND the suppressive person (further than she is already),
in the process.]
[Pa:]
"[What one 'should do' is:]
Listen to her,
tell her some good news, LF
accept some little presents from her. LF
Give her the feeling that she is liked.
[Note by Koos:
That is the way she wants to be "liked":
You should NOT like HER,
but you are being demanded to like her PRETENSE,
and you are demanded to pretend
that it is her that you like and NOT her pretense.]
[Pa:]
"All the other children and grandchildren do that." LFBD
(see however RI-10i 'Confronting a Suppressive' of 12 Oct 1994
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/ri-010i.htm)
[Auditor:] What is the truth about
what you did yesterday night?
[Pa:]
"Ma was upset about the fact that Koos phoned yesterday night. LFBD
"SHE doesn't want to talk to Koos,
SHE doesn't want that I help Koos in any way." LFBDBD
(see RI-841i 'My mother - regrettably, but true: a suppressive person')
(...) (continued in Part V)
'Pa Nolst Trenite'
Total session time: 9 hrs 39 min
Highly specialized Telepathic Auditing
at 700 US $ per hour, makes 6,755 US $ total cost.
(The abbreviations sF(small Fall), F(Fall), LF(Long Fall),
LFBD(Long Fall Blow Down) and F/N(Floating Needle) describe
reactions on the E-meter, indicating mental charge (sF, F,
LF, LFBD), and release of charge completed (F/N).
"LFBD-F/N" = truth found out. "ind" = indicated to the person.)
(See RI-610i 'Understanding the E-meter, correctly' of 26 June 96
RI-648i 'Simplicity of E-meter use, by UNDERSTANDING it' 1 Aug 96
RI-687i 'Notes on E-meter use and Solo-Auditing' 4 Sept 96
RI-771i 'Use of Telepathy' of 4 Jan 1997)
Koos Nolst Trenite - Ambassador for Mankind
Copyright 1997 by Koos Nolst Trenite
Personal Web-page:
http://ArtOrg.com
Personal Web-Library:
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/
Library Search Engine
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/search.html
References (available at the Library http://Art-Org.com):
(about Koos' parents and family)
RI-839i 'Recovering my father - Part I' of 26 Apr 97
RI-840i 'Recovering my father - Part II' of 26 Apr 97
RI-846i 'Recovering my father - Part III - Value of Telepathy' 28 Apr 97
RI-841i 'My mother - regrettably, but true: a suppressive' 26 Apr 97
RI-850i 'Re my father - IV - his marriage problem' of 29 Apr 1997
RI-851i 'Re my father - V - his pretended help' of 29 Apr 1997
RI-852i 'Re my father - VI - marriage-counseling for him' of 29 Apr 97
RI-853i 'Re my father - VII - Leopold on son Wolfgang Mozart' 29 Apr 97
RI-854i 'Re my father - VIII - Wolfgang Mozart on his father' 29 Apr 97
RI-855i 'Re my father - IX - Leopold Mozart's attitude' of 30 Apr 97
RI-856i 'Re my father - X - Mozart betrayed by his father' of 2 May 97
RI-811i 'Telepathic talk with my brother' of 27 Mar 1997
RI-767i 'My mother crediting me' of 21 Dec 1996
RI-698i 'Treat a Psychotic as a Psychotic (on my mother)' of 18 Sept 96
RI-697i 'Telepathic Auditing for my Father - On Friendships' 17 Sept 96
RI-689i 'Auditing a psychotic telepathically' of 7 Sept 1996
RI-688i 'Handling parents - a psychotic mother' of 7 Sept 1996
(about Koos Nolst Trenite)
RI-126Ri 'Koos Nolst Trenite - identity' of 29 Mar 1995
RI-480i 'Koos Nolst Trenite - Life-story' of 14 Feb 1996
RI-828i 'Koos Nolst Trenite personally visited' of 19 Apr 1997
(about marriage and family and problems in marriage)
RI-759i 'Understanding a Typical Marriage Problem' of 12 Dec 1996
RI-543i 'Dictators' of 22 July 1994, issued 2 May 1996
RI-631i 'Definition of "Woman"' of 12 July 1996
RI-537i 'The Right to Demand Awareness' of 15 Apr 1996
RI-629i 'Definition of "Care"' of 12 July 1996
RI-734i 'Orienting Children' of 13 Nov 1996
RI-781BPI'Raising Children - or Keeping Them Small?' of 14 Jan 97
RI-713i 'Handling Attacks Correctly - Space and Love' 18 Oct 1996
RI-602i 'Definition of Power' of 20 June 1996
RI-785i 'On Not Remedying Disagreements - "Not Talking"' of 24 Jan 97
RI-771i 'Use of Telepathy' of 4 Jan 1997
(about art and about religion)
RI-019Ri 'Artists and Ethics' of 10 Sept 1992
RI-704Ri 'Real Art is not hard to understand' of 30 Sept 1996
RI-738Si 'Christianity - Love, and Guilt solved' shortened 22 Dec 96
(about understanding and handling criminals and enemies)
RI-058Ri 'Fair Game Series - Treatment of Enemies' of 1 Jan 95
RI-487i 'Dialogue: On Enemies and Hostility' of 20 Feb 1996
RI-535i '"An Enemy of my Enemy is my Friend" = INSANE' of 10 Apr 1996
RI-646i 'FACING those who are mean or dishonest' of 31 July 1996
The 'Understanding Suppression Series':
http://Art-Org.com/ri-bulletins/usp.htm
(about RI-Bulletins)
RI-380Ri 'Obtaining Truth from the RI-Bulletins' of 1 Nov 1995
RI-50RQi 'RI-xxxi series Archive - Content and Use' 28 Dec 94
Revised and Replaced on 6 March 1996
These and other RI-Bulletins can well be obtained here - or
at the Library of Koos' writings on
http://Art-Org.com
or at the Archives at
ftp://thetics.europa.com/outgoing/adams/RI
Back to the RI-Bulletin index.